Saturday, May 27, 2006

Redneck Bullshit

This ties in with a post I made in my personal blog regarding bumper stickers. I'd like to hone in on a particular subset of stickers. I see them everywhere. Rebel this, Redneck that, Confederate blah blah. Let me reiterate what I've said before: heritage is one thing, but divisive bullshit is quite another.

I saw a sticker in a Georgia gas station that said "No Flag Had Better or Braver Soldiers" with a Confederate Stars and Bars flag to the left. Really? No flag? How about this one:
Recognize it? That's the UNITED States flag. I'd like to say that it's had many brave soldiers. More importantly, ones that can actually win wars. No disrespect to your ancestors, because they fought for what they believed in, which is a core American principal. However, you seem to transcend the heritage barrier and cross into loony, borderline traitorous devotion to an idea that didn't work then and wouldn't work today.

Another sticker said "If at first you don't secede, try try again." Let me lay it out for you: The South will NOT rise again. It never rose in the first place. Without the genius idea to go steal people from another continent to work for free on your farms, you wouldn't have enjoyed the economic success that you did. Mind you, if my employer stopped paying me, they would soon become the premier office supply store in the area. It's amazing what no labor costs do to gross margin.

Check out these gems.

So now the North was a terrorist force? This coming from the home land of a group that burns crosses in black people's yard for what purpose? They probably aren't inviting them outside for Jesus-infused wieners and smores.


Enough said.


If you can't read that, it says "I salute the Confederate Flag with Affection, Reverence, and Undying Devotion to the Cause for which it Stands." And what cause is that, pray tell? You should be more concerned with "I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same." That's what every naturalized citizen and soldier swears. If you were born here, chances are, you probably haven't heard it. Still applies to you though, assholes. "Rising again" would be an act of treason, as set forth in our Constitution. Let me paste the important part for you in case all the big words at the top confuse your simple Southern brain: "Article 3. Section 3. Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying war against them, or in adhering to their enemies, giving them aid and comfort." Think it over, you stupid dickweeds.

There are plenty of other mind-boggling examples of what traitors these Confederate loyalists are. I did find one sticker that I agreed with.

2 comments:

Megan said...

Why don't Southerners realize that THEY LOST?

"The South will rise again." Bullshit. It never rose in the first place.

Caitlin said...

teeheehee you make me giggle. i heart patriotism. it doesn't exist here in england, only the principle of "me" does. allow me to clarify: i am the most important person in the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD, so if you disagree with me in any way, shape, or form, from placement in the queue (i should be in the front because i'm that important) to legislature i don't like (who are you to tell me i can or can't declaw my cat), you can die and go to africa. i mean hell. but they mean africa, so you can go starve to death too.

seriously, these people are mean.

at least toothless men who sit on their front porches with shotguns can just be written off as crazy old coots that can't count past ten with their shoes on. what excuse does england have? or france? the entire EU? it's inconvenient for me to be patriotic right now, as there is a bill being passed that i don't support? bullshit.

at least the south still has the 'knowledge', however loosely the term is applied, that it's a pretty damn cool place to be. positivity in combination with ignorance is a far cry better than unscrupulous, and normally unjust, criticism that only serves to weaken the infrastructure.

i dunno. i'm tired.